When asked what is the number one need of men, most would go with this answer – Sex. For whatever reason, that is the word on the street; men’s number one need is sex. I believe this is what people think because of warped and shallow perceptions of manhood and masculinity. As though men only think with their little head or have a one track mind.
Since it is true that men consider sexual themes quite often during the day, it is concluded then, that is what men need. The truth of the matter is this; while sex is often on the mind of a man, it is what sex actually provides for his soul that determines what he needs.
So what does sex provide for a man’s soul? While sex is amazingly pleasurable, it provides deeper sustenance; connectedness, validation and being wanted. Men have just learned that sex is one way to get these things, but usually we don’t identify the deeper needs sex provides.
So how can a man experience connectedness, validation and being wanted outside of the context of sex? I think the number one need of men is Kindness.
The Number One Need of Men is KINDNESS!
If a woman believes the best in her man, communicates simply without criticism or contempt, touches often and uses good-hearted kindness in every way she moves with him; her man will have deep needs met. Sex is still very important, but Kindness is deeper and more sustaining.
Ladies, this is a huge challenge for you, especially if you are in a difficult season of life. Watch how you move with your man. Pay attention to your posture and tone. Begin to shift toward purposefully being kind and good to him. See what happens.